When I find the person who did this.....watch out!

I have a headcold. A slurply, snotty, drippy, sneezy, tissue-laden, n-dimensional hyperspace of bodily fluids. I blame students. I always blame students. I'm never sick when school is out. Damn them anyway.

I HATE being sick.

First, it makes me draggy. I don't do idle well. Anyone who spends time with me ends up saying something equivalent. Sitting around in bed for hot sex or relaxation is one thing, but when I want to get up and do, I'm ready to go. Colds zap that. So I'm STUCK in bed. And apparently, someone tied lead weights to my elbows. And it doesn't help that the Dowell redneck patrol is out doing target shooting today, so I have Jake (who may or may not have autumn fleas....I'm just saying), jumping on the bed every 10 minutes, climbing all over me, until I get fed up and push him off.

Second, I woke up this morning with no less than 20 used tissues wadded up beside me on the bed. Man, do I feel sexy now.

Third, what is UP with this every time I bend over, water runs out of my nose? Where did that come from? My sinuses appeared clear at the moment, right up until my upper torso got 3 degrees beyond horizontal. Then, LET THE FLOOD GATES OPEN!!!!

Finally, the medicine. They took all the good stuff out of the medicine, but somehow managed to make the part of it that makes you fall asleep even stronger. I was talking to someone online and fell asleep mid-sentence.

This had better be over by Sunday. Sunday is football. And we all know how Daktari feels about tall, dark, and handsome men in very tight shiny pants. They don't call it FantASSy football for nuthing. Yeah, baby!

1 comment:

  1. Ooh ooh! I know the answer to the bending over nose flood question! See, you have various sinuses in your skull: frontal, maxillary, sphenoid, ethmoid. You can look 'em up on wikipedia - they're there. Your maxillary sinuses are behind (technically within) your cheekbones. They are the ones draining on you. Why? Because they evolved when we weren't so upright. Their opening that drains into your nasal cavity is actually higher than most of the sinus. So the funk has to build up in order to drain up and out. Thus, when you bend over you have a flood o' funk - you're giving it an easy exit. Maybe spend a few minutes hanging your head upside down, and you'll get a fair amount of it out.

    Anatomy, baby. I knew all this crap I had to teach myself for TAing the class would come in handy someday.

    Hope you feel better in time to ogle sexy athletes.


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